POEM: Brad
So I just moved to Toronto (yay for moving up in the world) but it was huge transition for me leaving my hometown for good. Like a lot of writers, I feel as though I have a complex relationship with the town in which I grew up in.
In my writing circle, I was encouraged to write poems about the three cities that have most affected me: Bradford, Montreal and Toronto. With patience, guidance and a lot of butt kicking, I’m working towards a final manuscript for a collection of poetry entitled ‘3 cities’.
Last Tuesday I performed the following piece at Acoustic Soul Open Mic. It compliments my feelings about moving out of Bradford. Enjoy!
brad
you raised me
but i returned to you
older and furious
I
the lies
the manipulation
you twisted my childhood
into something not all together whole.
I
we’d love each other under
summer stars
staggering softly between the smell
of dried grass.
I
but i’ve outgrown you
blown you up to be this
big scary place
where black girls cry alone in the dark.
I
outgrown you
showed you that there is a
big world bubbling beyond you
and your boundaries.
I
you’ve pushed me
its always been just
you and me
in the middle of nowhere.
I
i’ve run out of air to curse you with.
you’ve changed too.
all the shit i gave you about
not being town-enough for me
you’ve beefed up into a real city
and i hardly recognize you anymore.
I
there was a time when i’d never
want to see you
or come back to you
your name twisted my face sour
all day long.
I
but i miss your smell
your secret hiding spots,
bring me back to when
i’d circle your parking lots
when i was too young
to ride your roads.
I
you fed me onions off
a cargo truck once, in the middle of the
street and i came back
with a black garbage bag
for more of your sweet veg.
I
you made me feel safe
when the big city scared me
your silence blanketed me
when the noise was too much.
I
i’ve outgrown you
but it’s not easy letting go
of you, i can’t stay anymore
you know it too, it’s why you
whistle when i walk by
I
promise to visit
but we both know
i can’t be yours anymore.
Oh, and be sure to check the blog regularly for updates about ‘3 cities’ launch date. Big t’ings!
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